One word: boobs.
From a writing standpoint, the canny thing to do is capitalize on an opening like that and not lose momentum (and your readers). However, I realized after my first blog post that I was opening this up to readers beyond the followers of my Facebook and Live Journal and should probably introduce myself. My name is Suzanne or Sue (Ms. Jackson if you’re Nasty) and I live in Oklahoma. I majored in English, procrastinated at writing, and I married an amazing guy who has gleefully (yes, gleefully!) read every word I have ever written as it was being written and offered glowing critiques even if they were just, “You know, babe, what really made that paragraph sing was your understanding of the proper usages of ‘which’ and ‘that.'” Together we have a three-year-old son and a house full of geek.
I should also note that I began this blog three days before we leave for a Disney vacation and that this will therefore be the last entry for a week or so. Those of you who know me well are saying yes, yes, we know all of this, you’ve reminded us daily that you’re going to see the Mouse, now, I believe you were saying something about boobs?
Little something for the ladies.
I hadn’t planned to do thematic entries (although I’m not sure why; I’m a former cheerleader and pick-a-committee-chairperson from the mid-south: give me a theme and I’ll beat it into the ground) but I had planned to offer exercise, health and fashion information I’ve found useful in my better health journey and I really wanted to blog a bra recommendation and this seemed the most seamless (seamless, get it?) way to do it. Other entries will be a grab-bag (a Cuisinart, if you will) of topics because I’m unpredictable and mysterious like that (total lie on the mystery: a box of Samoas and I’ll tell you anything you want to know).
Healthy weight or over-weight, my body type is a genetic anomaly from my mother’s side of narrow-hipped, generously breasted women. Fashion-wise, it’s like trying to dress an open umbrella. In my heavier days, trying to attempt a strapless bra was verboten beyond needing one 20 years ago for my wedding gown. My experience with strapless bras for women above a C-cup was that the chest band was supportive and compressing (uh, I get plenty of calcium, I don’t need my ribs lifted and separated, but thanks?) while the cups were, in the words of the Motor City Madman, a free-for-all (you can bet your life!).
Having worked on toning my upper arms (a problem area for me) and shoulders and wishing to wear halters, tanks and tops with shoulder-slits, a strapless bra was de rigueur since my bosom laughs in the face of shelf-bras and “built-in cups.” Through much trial and error (and dressing room mirror horrors that either looked like DIY porn or World Health Organization breast-feeding PSAs) I found my MacGuffin (all geek references can be decrypted at urbandictionary.com).
The Lilyette Strapless Bra by Maidenform ($25-$35) is perfection in Nylon. Affordable, sleek, un-padded and lightly lined and most importantly, guaranteed to STAY IN PLACE. It’s the stacked chick’s invitation to wiggle wiggle wiggle on the dance floor with no fear of it inching down to your ankles mid-shimmy. It’s also COMFORTABLE. It wears like a bra, not an ace bandage or Xena boob-armor (hot as that might be). Hurrah for the bra!
In further yay, bewbs, yay! news, whole foods can do more than tone your tummy and shrink your britches size; fresh fruits and vegetables are also one the greatest super powers in promoting breast/chest health in both men and women. The leading breast cancer fighting foods are:
- Brussels sprouts
- Leafy greens (collards, kale, spinach)
Source: Women’s Health @ About.com
Exercising regularly throughout your life and focusing on consistency and duration, not intensity, is also an overall healthy lifestyle choice that has been proven to reduce cancer risk.
This is one of my favorite breast/chest workouts for women. Breasts are composed of glands and fat (hey, guess who got an A in Bio!) so exercise doesn’t affect them, but it *can* target the surrounding muscle tissue and lift and tone and reduce or prevent sag. I like the following vid because the exercises are feasible for beginners and the fitness model is very anti-model. While she’s attractive, toned and very fit, she looks like she could have taught you to play the flugelhorn in 5th grade and not like she should be spam tweeting you “Hey I Need a Date: Check out my Pix!”
Plus, I’m an Anglophile and that accent slays me. And now our daily recipe: Baked Egg Cups. Get it? Cups? Oh, leave me alone; I figured chicken breast was too on the nose, so to speak, and besides I did those last time.
BAKED EGG CUPS
These were blowing UP on Pinterest a few weeks ago. If you haven’t tried them out, enjoy!
Baked Egg Cups
12 thin slices of deli ham (round)
1/2 Cup of your favorite cheese (I used Parmesan)
1/2 Cup diced scallions
Fresh cracked Sea Salt and Pepper
Preheat the oven to 400. Spray a muffin tin with cooking spray. Lay a piece of ham in each hole creating a little ham cup. Crack one egg into each hole and sprinkle with salt and pepper.
Bake the eggs for about 12 minutes…until the white is firm and the yolk is still nice and runny. Carefully remove each egg from the muffin tin and top with grated cheese and scallions. Serve hot! Yield: 12
Each cup is 100 calories and contains 17.6 grams of protein.
Source: The Simple Delights
And I will leave on a whimsical note. If you haven’t discovered the voice of Priscilla Ahn, please allow me to rectify that. This song isn’t a parody or risqué, it’s actually rather poignant and sweet.
“The Boobs Song,” by Priscilla Ahn